Tuesday, June 22, 2010

The Mat Rempits need a break, and so do I

Mat Rempits were formerly malay retards and idiots.

However they evolved into sub-intelligent primates somewhere in 1971 and they ride bicycles in the circus. In 1982 they stopped growing tails, they moved on to 70cc motorbikes because they no longer have tails that might get burnt accidentally by the exhaust pipe.

Although they were still retarded during that time (and still are..) they somehow managed to look and learn the hollywood stunt mans. Through their understanding of friction, they created a super-low-cost-and-fuel-efficient method of riding the motorbikes. The Mat Rempit is Malaysia's super-low-cost-pastime for Malay retards to show-off their biking skills on the traffic-ridden streets of Kuala Lumpur.

These kids are so desperate, they must do zig zag like a monkey, look backwards at full speed (very important tactic) and suddenly stop at roadside smoking, phone calling, etc. The crazier they drive, the sexier they look, it seems.

Mat Rempits also have been influenced by the western art and media culture, taking up terms such as Superman , Spiderman, Ironman, Cicakman and also Deadman. They start from young, when their dads give them their very first "kapcais" (100cc motorbikes).

However, they are also very patriotic too by waving Malaysian flags all around during Independence Day shouting "Merdeka!", and then ending up under a van.

They are also main contributors to Malaysia's Vision 2020 goal to have a 70 million population through mass rape of gullible Malay teenagers and their fellow Minah Rempits. Their role is absolutely crucial because the population growth of the Chinese and the Indians are grinding to a halt - both due to migration and improved family planning. The government hopes someday to populate the entire streets with crazy-ass Mat Rempits and show the entire world just how responsible Malaysian bikers are.

Rempit styles

  • The Superman style was created by Yap Yong Phui from Bandar Kinrara. The style is performed by lying down horizontally on the bike and speeding at 150kmh. Guinness world of records were amazed when they tested the results and found out the this method actually increased the speed by 20% and giving them +2 bonus when evading police roadblocks. The Sailboat method was also a jaw-dropping skill where the rempit stands on the seat of the bike and control the bike via their feet. This method harness the wind's energy and thus lowers fuel consumption and saving enough money to buy drugs and cigarettes, giving them -25% fuel consumption, +10% money saving, +3 bonus when there is a strong wind. Another way is where the rempit does a willy where they will carry the front wheels and ride only on the back wheel. With less surface touching the ground, they manage to lower the friction, this is the most common method and can be found on the streets of Penang almost every midnight.
  • The Deadman method is usually found near traffic lights or under a lorry's wheel. Usually rempits will zig-zag in traffic and end up under a lorry or fly across a junction when the traffic light is red at the speeds of 120km/h and usually end up colliding with a solid object. This is another common method in rempiting especially among the newbies. However, there is one drawback. This skill is the ultimate skill where the user can only cast it once in their life. After casting it, no cards can be drawn and regrets are not accepted. Loser loses 40 lives and gains a +150% pain bonus and +3 bonus from instant death. If user has helmet, loser only loses 30 lives and gains only 120% pain bonus and +30% chance of succumbing into a coma.
  • The Spiderman method is where rempits ride the motorbike in pairs. The pillion rider stands at the back of the seat. The driver gains -20% fuel consumption because the pillion harnesses the energy from the wind. The pillion rider gets high and starts swinging his hand like a propeller and thus giving the motorbike a +50% speed boost for 8 seconds. During this time, there is a 20% chance that the pillion rider will fall off the bike and suffer broken bones. This is probably the best way to enjoy rempiting if you do not have driving license.


This is a favourite past time for Mat Rempits as well as useless half-dead malay zombies. It is a very complex game which includes the elements of football, merry-go-round and monopoly. The main players are referred to as penagih or addicts. A pengedar/distributor will monopolize the field, providing the penagihs with needles and poison to play with.

The addicts inject themselves with poison, and then pass the needle around and wait for their turn. A red card is given when a player of the distributor crosses the line where the police/linesmen will drag them out where the judge/referee will decide their fate. Usually, the distributors will be sent to the slaughter house for providing low quality poison whereas the addicts will be sent to pusat serenti/recovery centre to be trained.Usually addicts will learn martial arts in the pusat serenti where they will graduate and return to society to utilize their skills during robbery or theft.
Suntik-go-round is very popular and is usually played in abandoned buildings, behind old shoplots, and some residential playground. Playing at 3am in the morning is a must for Mat Rempits because this game will help them concentrate when they ride their motorbike.

Mat Rempit Life Styles

  • Mat rempits are now wasting time trying to get money by robbing people. They will ride their cheap 'kapsais' motorcycle and surround a car driven by a person who is alone. This thing will happen at night time only, because Mat Rempit will be invisible at night. The leader will smash a car window and try to threaten the driver so he/she gives his/her money and jewelry to the mat rempit.
So far Mat Rempits that try to rob people's car when they are alone have escaped because the driver cannot see mat rempit's at night. Some drivers with bionic eyes will immediately press the accelerator and drive over the idiot Mat Rempits and kill as many as he can. He will gain +30 to max hit point for every Mat Rempit he kills. Mat rempits that are killed will lose 30 lives and will have to form a new group of Mat Rempits. He will also loose his money and his brains (if he didn't have any, then he will be used to it).

Other Family members of Mat Rempit

  • Car Rempit - Just like the Mat Rempit but richer with their fully modded cars such as SLK(Smart Little Kancil), Saga Turbo, Beng-Wira, Suck-tria, Wa-Jadi-Lotion or ProtonJunk-2. There are also very wealthy Car Rempits who use super cars such as Civic EG, Toyota Vios, Nissan Sentra or Ferrari Enzo-ciplak. Normally they race in the public road or highway. Besides speeding and drifting in the illegal F1 they can perform other amazing stunts like the Mat Rempits such as the wheelie, wikang, pacak or even the Superman. Stickers all over the surface and the big mirror,Mitsubishi logo and loud exhaust, GT-Wing or gigantic spoilers are a MUST for their modified cars.
  • Mat Salleh - The white people from the west are know as Mat Salleh for the villege people. It was believe some of the Mat Rempit ancestors were Mat Salleh. Thus they sharing the same surname Mat.
  • Bus Rempit - Also known as Bas F1. Ex-Mat Rempits who are now working as a bus driver or father of the Mat Rempit. They display the same craziness as the Car Rempits and the Mat Rempits, and much worse. They love to block a 3-lane road to become a bus stop.
  • Lorry Rempit - Also known as Lori Hantu. Same as the Bus Rempits but they are more furious with their big and powerful vehicles. Lorry Rempits are also known as invisible men as they are always missing after getting involved in a traffic accident
  • Taxi Rempit - Also known as Teksi Terbang. Besides giving their passengers heart attacks when they zig-zag through trafic (and also crazy taxi fares), they are now encouraged to have side buisnesses within their cars to have more money for cigaretes and sirih.
  • Pizza Rempit - Mat Rempits with a job in the food buisness. Normally not found under normal conditions, these uniformed Mat Rempit fly out of a fast food restaurant on their EX5 Dreams at about 100 km/h everytime the number 1300-88-2525 is called. Sometimes more powerful bikes such as the RX-Z are found outside their headquarters, probably used for faster deliveries (and more splatted brain toppings on the road if you don't get your pizza in 20 minutes). They are also capable of all Mat Rempit stunts especially the 12 o'clock wheelie (the pizza box acts as a stabiliser). However, this kind of Rempit is actually USEFUL to our community; you never have to wait long for food (as long as the rider doesn't do a Deadman stunt).
  • Mat Cemerlang - A licensed or legal Mat Rempit recognized by the Son-in-Law of the Malaysia's Prime Minister a.k.a The next Prime Minister of Malaysia.
  • Mat Skodeng - Skodeng in Malay means spy which is Malaysia's National Islamic Counsil idea to have our own secret agent a.k.a Mat Skodeng to spy for Tangkap-Basah and the terrorist-USA to protect the Queen Married VI.
  • Mat Paipon - Mat Paipon (pronounce as Matt Payphone) is a white version of Mat Rempit which can be found under the old bridge of Corrib river in Galway, Ireland. This group of retards people are refugees, after losing to Isaac Newton in a series of bicycle races. Descendants of Mat Paipons are now busy studying physics in order to set a revenge match of bicycle race.
  • Minah Rempit - the female companion to the Mat Rempit. They act as prostitutes on a motorcycle who craves for a gangbang. Sadly, most of these girls were victims of MRC (Malaysia's Rape Culture), you know lah, 20 years of anti-English education system, clever-clever politicians, Asian value, excessive moral, Datukship, rasuah etc....aaaiiyoh! Fathers, brothers and uncles raped them at age of 12, 10 or even 8, yet these girls dare not make report. What worst is, most raping/incest cases were swept under the carpet, to reduce face-losing, but don't worry Malaysia, it's all Singapore's fault. Ya. Malaysia Boleh.
  • MatCyclop
He is the powerful Malay hero. MatCyclop is a hero living in the jungle. Actually he is normal human being until one day he was bitten by an AIDS infected wild boar and the HIV virus gain him mysterious power to transform into MatCyclop. His eyes turned into two eggs, a keris logo appeared at his chest and pig-skinned cloak on his body. He has rope on his neck in order to swing from tree to tree. When the Malay get lost on their way back from jungle, they will shout...."Help, Help, Help, MatCyclop". After that, the Matcyclop appear to rescue. One day, MatCyclop was having his favourite dish -- Nasi Lemak. Suddenly he was chocked to death by a "IKAN BILIS". The Malay made a remembrance statue for him.

Taken from Uncyclopedia

The Wikipedia version here

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Is marriage just about gathering and spending resources?

Yes... I would simply put it that way if the enquirer wants a direct and instant answer.

But marriage is about life as a whole, and life does not necessarily is (or have to be) that simple.

Yes, money can ease us many of the financial burdens that life can often throw our way. But money can also be the source of all the problems in the world, which would then turn against us and burden us for life.

The Malaysian Insider yesterday (16 June) posted Dina Zaman's highly opinionated piece What are we teaching our young women? which prompted me to write this entry.

It tells about the grumbles (complaints rather) of her (Dina's) male friends' perception on how young women of today would prefer to assess their partners finances and “potential” before moving on to richer men.

On a personal account, I have come across women who are from this category. She wanted to know what I do for a living first before giving any commitments for a date with her. I was just asking if I can date her as we are varsity friends doing assignments together. She is single and so was I and that time. I did answer her query but find it disgusting and decided that she was not worth the trouble.

The fact that women would choose to tag on wealthy men and prefer to 'goyang kaki' rather than toil to their own goals in life by gathering their own resources is a no-brainer. They are just plain lazy. Why should women do all the hard work if they can offer men what they have, and men in turn can give them what they want -- they would argue.

But I have to agree with Dina's statement implying that "Women (and some men) marrying for wealth and status is not something new. It is as old as the oldest profession: sex work. Some feminists will argue that marriage can be considered legalised prostitution."

Of course, there are instances of gold-diggers or the 'pisau cukur' type out there. They are the ones waiting for the right opportunity or prey on rich men to become their target. Once they get what they are there for, they are gone, and most time without a 'trace' or admission that they had done so because of 'it'. But women of this category would rather not admit that they are the type.

Who on earth would not get angry if somebody else imply that you are that typical bitch? Well, unless you are the lowly type or the 'disordered' who would stoop to admit that you are one, it is beyond me -- feminist, first or second wave whatnot.

Nonetheless, while I agree that there are many instances of women who are the mercenary type, i.e. those who marry for wealth and status, all women are not alike. Some are just sincere in wanting to find and share their life with Mr Right, and if the Mr Right happens to be rich, then it's a bonus. Otherwise, they would just have to work harder by themselves to get what they want in life.

Yes, women would prefer to be with men who they perceived are a potential life partner, i.e. the financially responsible breadwinner, more so when they (women) themselves would one day think about quitting their job due to circumstances that may come their way. So it is very important that the men they marry is trustworthy and responsible, meaning these men must be the person they love and trust 'till death do us part'.

But not all men are trustworthy and responsible and not all men can hold on to the 'promises' to their death bed. This is especially true to men who has very strong potential and ability to gather resources more than what ordinary men can do. These men carry with them a baggage of philosophical deficiency that confines to an attitude which caters to his own needs or affairs rather than about others or the family.

So what's the fuss all about.

Apparently most women are not that particularly concerned about whether their chosen partner should have some listed criteria to be categorized as viable or less viable as a 'potential' husband. So long as they think these men share the same values and attitude in life as they do, then it's okay with them.

But, there are exceptions when people in poor Asian countries like the Philippines, Myanmar and Vietnam where the women would 'sell' themselves to marry rich western men, regardless of whether they are compatible or in 'love' with their prospective 'husbands', young or old. This is a matter of survival.

These women would believe that this is a better choice (marrying rich western men), rather than stay in their own land making themselves susceptible marrying young but immature and irresponsible brats. Young uneducated men in less developed nations tend to put everything behind the moment they lay their eyes or opportunity on other younger and beautiful women.

But all this freedom of rich foreign men marrying young Asian women in their own land arbitrarily is to stop soon.

In Indonesia, for example the government is proposing that foreign men who wants to wed Indonesian women should pay a 'security guarantee' of US$55,000 (RM181,500) before they can do so. But this is just a 'deposit' so as not to simply allow foreign men to come and 'conquer' a women to their fancy and 'discard' them when no longer needed. If the couple divorce, the wife will be entitled for the money.

The couple could however keep the money as 'shared property' if they can stay married for at least 10 years. But this proposal requires foreign men wishing to marry Muslim women only -- it will not apply to couples of other religion.

Not a bad bargain, don't you think!

Well, come to think of it Dina Zaman is right about her closing statement: "It is sad, though, that a person’s marital worth is based on his potential, and financial status. At the end, a young man is just a piggy bank."

I would like to add: Gold-diggers or the ordinary women out on a "Mr. Right" looking spree, sincere or otherwise, would not only lay their eyes on young men with a piggy bank, but any potential men who has the right resources they want out of a marriage, young or old.

Men would offer what the women want and vice-versa. In other words, the women would provide their services and the men just pay. Just like what the 'feminist' put it -- legalised prostitution.

So to put things into another perspective -- 'marriage' is just a 'contract' or another business transaction.

So, what's the 'big deal' when both parties or one of it decided to 'legally' end the contract? Just end the contract and part our own ways? Yes...no..., life would be a comfort if it's so.

No, the BIG DEAL comes into the picture when both or the other party tend to disagree on the disbursement (on their supposed shared property) due to the contract ending, which in the first place was a poorly written and an unfairly balanced one. So, the bad thing about a 'marriage contract' boils down to a bad breaking-up-to-do post divorce agreement, don't you think?

Then, let's-play-the-blame-game and sue each other rather than solve it... it sure makes everyone in the family happy...No?

So, what does all this tells us what life is all about?

Life is about gathering resources and spending them. But would it be fair that while your partner is sweating like shit trying to gather all the resources for you and the family, you are complaining about not getting enough. And you would rather sit down 'goyang kaki' by not working while you 'perabih duit laki aku' just because you think 'why shouldn't you?'

To the women of this philosophical belief I just have this to say: Good luck to you till hell freezes over.

Yes, marriage is also about gathering resources (and spending them). But REAL marriage is different because it is about sharing and caring. Many modern women, educated or the less educated go to work to gather and share their resources with their husbands for the family. This is the ideal thing to do especially when the husband is the one who is less resourceful in the family.

But the problem starts when some women believe on the affirmation or mantra that "my money is my money, and your money is my money". They would rather split hairs rather than giving in their share of the resource to the family. Or they would give in and then bicker over it.

So, to all the couples and couples-wannabees, good luck to you and your marriage however 'heavenly happy' or 'to hell and back' life you are having right now and in the future.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Orang tua gatal - paradox of Malaysian marriages or Malaysian psyche?

The last time the Malaysian public kicked a fuss over the trend of old men marrying young girls was in 2006 when Datuk K (Khalid Mohamad Jiwa) weds pop princess Datin Siti Nurhaliza (now Dato').

In internet forums, YM, social media sites and blogs, Datuk K who is 20 years senior than Siti was insinuated directly and indirectly as the "orang tua gatal" who likes to prowl on young and pretty girls. Siti on the other hand was referred as the young and successful woman (also a gatal) who preferred older and richer men including married or formerly married men as her partner. Rumour was also abound that Siti was directly implicated with Datuk K's separation and finally the divorce from his ex.

Apparently, all these accusations and insinuations (which remained to be rumours) were quashed when both of them came out in the open to finally quell all the irresponsible lies.

During the Parliamentary debate on the Population and Family Development (Amendment) Bill 2006, Datuk Mohamed Aziz (BN –Sri Gading) hinted about the two when he quipped, “It's a good thing I am no longer young. What are younger men going to be left with if women their age prefer older men?” bringing laughter to the House.

Datuk Bung Mokhtar Radin (BN – Kinabatangan) then interjected and said married men should defend themselves and not to give in to younger women who seemed to be more attracted to “veteran men” (look who's talking?).

Datuk Bung Mokhtar later married actress Zizie Ezzate, who is 20 years younger than his age, in December 2009.

Only Dr Rozaidah Talib (BN – Ampang) who was bold enough to stress that a relationship between a younger woman and a married man or divorcee should not be openly publicised as it involved the feelings of the children and ex-wife. She added that the relationship and marriage of Siti and Datuk K should ensure that they did not hurt the children or ex-wife.

The whole report here.

Today Kosmo! focused a three page report on this paradox -- older men marrying younger girls -- by portraying the marriage of Aziz M Osman, a divorcee and his less than one week marriage to Puteri Lily Lokman, who is an anak dara and more than 20 years younger than him.

Titled "AZIZ TAK GATAL" and "Kahwin bukan kerana harta", the article, written by Haryati Karim opens up the ugly truth about the Malay psyche with regards to this paradox.

No need to further comment on this as I fully agree with the writer. The stigma and ill feelings that we, the Malays (and Malaysians in general) prefer to associate ourselves with (regard to these paradoxes), should stop. Not all old men who happens to marry younger women have dirty agendas and not all young women marrying older and rich men have one thing in their minds that we usually associate them with.

Cinta itu buta or Love is Blind as the saying goes, so if we are sincere to ourselves and others, let love flourish regardless of the age difference between any couple.

Monday, June 7, 2010

"An Evening with Cikgu Alias, the reader & the stud"

Wife of award-winning teacher Alias Ismail, Rosmawati Abdullah, 41 lamented that there was nothing wrong in talking openly about sex between married couples.
“He is being honest about sex because he is concerned that the social ills among students are quite high. It’s important not to have illicit sex. People should scrap the mentality that sex education is taboo,” she said as reported in yesterday's theStar news: Don’t read too much into hubby’s book and sex story, says wife.

Alias Ismail, 42 a Bahasa Malaysia teacher at SMK Menerong, Hulu Terengganu last week won the inaugural recipient of the state-initiated Tokoh Nilam award as an ourstanding teacher. He was reported to have shared his secret to remaining active -- to read, have an intellectual discussion with his wife and having sex nightly.

TheStar news report: Award-winning teacher’s secret – reading and sex on his confession of nightly sex with his wife received much criticism from readers, especially from the conservative Malaysians who regarded sex as a private matter and that it should not be made public.

A Mysinchew.com article posted on theMalaysianInsider by Tay Tian Yan on 3 June poked fun of his confession with a funny satirical piece: What’s love got to do with it?

Tian Yan wrote:
But he is telling everyone that half his achievement has been attributed to his daily love-making routine. Should other teachers and his pupils take the cue from him? As a teacher par excellence, a prominent figure in the education sector, he should have shared his teaching experience instead, for example, how to advance holistic education and how to prevent our schools from turning into “hell schools” like the one in Rawang, among many other things. Perhaps, Alias should take up an offer to speak for Tongkat Ali products, but where education is concerned, he has been talking nothing but trash. And from the medical perspective, he should consult a physician, or a psychologist, to get his indulgence fixed.

In response to that, Alias said he was disappointed by these people who were attempting to discredit him. He insisted that he was not a hypocrite and was encouraging only legitimate sex.

“Many people in Kuala Berang shook hands and congratulated me after Friday prayers saying that I was different from other teachers. A day prior to that, a group of teachers in Hulu Terengganu threw a party for me for winning the award,” he added.

The couple’s eldest son, Mohammad Sallehuddin, 24, said his father was a “sporting” dad who openly discussed matters that were taboo in other families. “He teaches us to be humble while advising us not to indulge in illicit sexual relationships,” Mohammad said.

Meanwhile, in the latest response to the debate, theStar today revealed that Alias has been offered to conduct a number of workshops for schoolchildren and married couples.

In the news report: Workshop offers pouring in for teacher, Malaysian Public Service Society president Andrew Raju, who is based in Seremban, said he was impressed with Alias’ honesty and wanted him to conduct the workshops at selected schools and venues. Raju said he would approach a corporate organisation to fund the workshops, dubbed “An Evening with Cikgu Alias”.

Meanwhile, State NUTP chairman Awang Abdullah @ Pui Piong Gee said Alias was a dedicated teacher who had contributed towards educational excellence in the country. He said NUTP was proud of Alias who had won numerous awards.

“We are backing him all the way as there is suddenly an attempt by certain quarters to undermine him. These critics are just sour grapes,” he said.

Yeah, sour grapes are not good for health. Go..go... Cikgu Alias, show 'em they are wrong and that there are as much blood in your brains as it can contain in your dick.

Friday, June 4, 2010

(The final sequel of the) Dead Man's Chest

Dead Man's Chest is the title of the 2nd sequel of the movie, Pirates of the Caribbean starring Johnny Depp, Bill Nighy, Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley. The film, released globally in July, 2006 received mixed reviews from viewers, with praise for its special effects and criticism for its confusing plot and lengthy running time.

But this blog entry is not about the movie or the character in the movie - Captain Jack Sparrow, it's about a real life struggle for a fair share on a real dead man's estate.

You can be the richest man in the world, but life's baggage would still tag on to you , even after you have kicked the bucket and although the money you left could pay for anything the world can offer.

Ever wondered that one of Malaysia's celebrated corporate sons had a second family (wife in a polygamous marriage) snugged secretly somewhere in this country or elsewhere. And now this second family (wife and five children) are suing for control of six companies now being held by the late businessman's first wife and their five children.

Read the news: Second wife sues for control of Naza empire or the Malay version Keluarga kedua Nasimuddin tuntut RM350 juta

Tan Sri SM Nasimuddin SM Amin, who passed away in 1 May 2008, might not be the richest man in this country but he was certainly one of the most respected businessman around. He started humbly importing and selling reconditioned cars in PJ and KL in the mid 70s. In the 80s and 90s his company, Naza was known to be one of the most successful automobile importers in the world.

It was told that he reaped his first million ringgit in just one year after his first business deal in 1976 at the age of 21. It is also said that his success was due to his prudence and simplicity. He saved every sen he received from his parents since his school days, and from what he earned helping his father in his construction business and later from his job as a clerk.

Read about his life history here.

In 2008 he secured the Ferrari, Peugeot and Harley-Davidson franchises and TTDI commenced work on his Platinum Park project. And prior to his demise, he created an RM260 million state of the art factory in Gurun, Kedah, one of the biggest automobile showrooms in Asia in PJ, 4000 jobs, and helped support 10,000 further jobs indirectly (vendors, suppliers, etc.).

And most of all, Tan Sri Nasimuddin was fondly remembered as a very nice man. He never said bad words, never shouted at, or scolded his employees, he never condemned others with hateful words and always wanted to make friends, even with those who spoke ill of him. After meeting up, even those who had some misgivings or felt he was given too much were surprised by his simple and humble behaviour (taken somewhere on the web, without permission).

But despite that, there are stories about him and his family that we had not known until today when the second family blew the cover. It's not about having a polygamous marriage (for someone like him) is a bad thing to do. But having the second family to file a legal suit from the first family to claim millions worth of property would certainly taint his almost perfect image in the eyes of the ordinary Malaysians and more so his worshipers in the business world.

Do you think the first family would give in to the demands of the second family?

Well, certainly not...! hence the legal suit.

In the file of claims, the suit named 15 defendants starting with the estates previously owned by Nasimuddin, Nasimuddin's first wife Puan Sri Zaleha Ismail, 57, and her children, Datuk Faisal, 31, Nur Diana, 28, Sheikh Mohd Nasarudin, 26, Sheikh Mohd Faliq, 25, and Nur Nadia, 24.

The rest are Naza Kia Sdn Bhd, Naza Automotif Manufacturing Sdn Bhd, Nasim Sdn Bhd, Naza Motor Trading Sdn Bhd, Naza TTDI Sdn Bhd, NZ Wheels Sdn Bhd, Ekspedisi Nikmat Sdn Bhd and CIMB Trustee Berhad (all 15 defendants).

In the novel  Treasure Island (1883), where the title of this blog entry (Dead Man's Chest) fits in with the whole story, Robert Louis Stevenson only wrote the chorus, leaving the remainder of the song unwritten, and to the reader's imagination:
"Fifteen men on the dead man's chest--
...Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!
Drink and the devil had done for the rest--
...Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!"

...and now the first plaintiff is asking - still got room for another six?