Orang tua gatal - paradox of Malaysian marriages or Malaysian psyche?

The last time the Malaysian public kicked a fuss over the trend of old men marrying young girls was in 2006 when Datuk K (Khalid Mohamad Jiwa) weds pop princess Datin Siti Nurhaliza (now Dato').

In internet forums, YM, social media sites and blogs, Datuk K who is 20 years senior than Siti was insinuated directly and indirectly as the "orang tua gatal" who likes to prowl on young and pretty girls. Siti on the other hand was referred as the young and successful woman (also a gatal) who preferred older and richer men including married or formerly married men as her partner. Rumour was also abound that Siti was directly implicated with Datuk K's separation and finally the divorce from his ex.

Apparently, all these accusations and insinuations (which remained to be rumours) were quashed when both of them came out in the open to finally quell all the irresponsible lies.

During the Parliamentary debate on the Population and Family Development (Amendment) Bill 2006, Datuk Mohamed Aziz (BN –Sri Gading) hinted about the two when he quipped, “It's a good thing I am no longer young. What are younger men going to be left with if women their age prefer older men?” bringing laughter to the House.

Datuk Bung Mokhtar Radin (BN – Kinabatangan) then interjected and said married men should defend themselves and not to give in to younger women who seemed to be more attracted to “veteran men” (look who's talking?).

Datuk Bung Mokhtar later married actress Zizie Ezzate, who is 20 years younger than his age, in December 2009.

Only Dr Rozaidah Talib (BN – Ampang) who was bold enough to stress that a relationship between a younger woman and a married man or divorcee should not be openly publicised as it involved the feelings of the children and ex-wife. She added that the relationship and marriage of Siti and Datuk K should ensure that they did not hurt the children or ex-wife.

The whole report here.

Today Kosmo! focused a three page report on this paradox -- older men marrying younger girls -- by portraying the marriage of Aziz M Osman, a divorcee and his less than one week marriage to Puteri Lily Lokman, who is an anak dara and more than 20 years younger than him.

Titled "AZIZ TAK GATAL" and "Kahwin bukan kerana harta", the article, written by Haryati Karim opens up the ugly truth about the Malay psyche with regards to this paradox.

No need to further comment on this as I fully agree with the writer. The stigma and ill feelings that we, the Malays (and Malaysians in general) prefer to associate ourselves with (regard to these paradoxes), should stop. Not all old men who happens to marry younger women have dirty agendas and not all young women marrying older and rich men have one thing in their minds that we usually associate them with.

Cinta itu buta or Love is Blind as the saying goes, so if we are sincere to ourselves and others, let love flourish regardless of the age difference between any couple.